by Nikki Boss
“When you come back, I will be here like this.”
“What does that mean?”
“Nothing to you but everything to me.”
“Sarah.” I love how he says my name, Say-ruh.
“Come here.” I pull him to me, my hands cupping the back of his neck. He pulls away.
“I have to go.”
“You could stay if you wanted to.”
“I can do anything I want.”
“Except stay with me.” And there it is. It does not matter what I want or what he wants; there will always be this.
He scans the room for his clothes.
“In the bathroom,” I tell him. He goes to fetch them and I use the moment to light a cigarette. Inhale deeply and let the smoke unfurl from my mouth.
I ignore him.
“Say-ruh.” I will not go to him.
“James.” I state his name rather than reply. Take another drag and let it poison me.
“You can lie in that bed all day and it does nothing.”
I spit back. “I can do whatever I want.”
The door slams. He is leaving me again.
Nikki Boss lives in New England with her husband, children, and too many animals. She is currently a MFA candidate at Vermont College of Fine Arts and teaches middle school English.